See Jane Knit

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

A Few Prudent Notes to Myself 

This entry is going to be composed of a few things that I need to remember before I start any new project. Here goes:

If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

If it looks awkward in the photo, it will probably look that way in real life.

If it looks awkward on the model, it will probably look akward on me.

If it's not similar to anything I already have in my closet, then I probably won't wear it.

If I have to buy special underwear to wear it, then I probably won't wear it often/won't wear it at all.

If garments of its type usually are reinforced with plenty of elastic and/or boning, then it probably won't stay up.

Phew. I almost feel better.

ALMOST. Behold, the source of my shame.

cabled bandeau 1
Looks OK with a tank top underneath ... but what is that odd bulge in the back?

cabled bandeau 2

cabled bandeau 3

Why am I standing in that odd position with that forlorn look on my face? Because if I wasn't pressing my arms to my sides in that photo, you would all be getting a good look at my bra. That also accounts for the forlorn look.

Yes, it's the Cabled Bandeau, and yes, things are not working out. I deserve 50 lashes for being dumb enough to knit myself a tube top, BUT (and this is a very big but) Veronik Avery deserves 100 lashes for designing a tube top in alpaca, merino, and silk. Alpaca. Silk, for crying out loud. Two of the least elastic fibers out there. Now, my Bandeau is made of 100% merino, and has been knit to a size that allows three inches of negative ease. So if my top won't stay up, then I bet that IK red-head is holding on to her damn top with her very life, because the alpaca and silk sure can't be helping that shit stay put. Now that I think about it, that might account for the look on her face. She looks almost as forlorn as I do in the photos above.

So now I must decide what to with this thing. Like I said in my last entry, I can't really keep it as it is now; it's too obscene for ordinary wear, not kinky enough for any other kind of wear, and I don't think anyone (myself included) needs a kicky tubular throw. I have considered many things. After having eliminated the irrelevant options (such as lighting my hair on fire and stabbing my eyes out with an Addi Turbo like some knit-deranged Oedipus Rex) here are the ones that seem feasible:

1)Add straps. This could mean something like a halter top, i.e. attaching one strap to the left and right front and then tying behind the back of my neck, or possibly two straps on each side that would tie above each shoulder. This would end up being more of a tank top.

2) Adding elastic thread at the top. I already have some, and it would probably take atleast 2 strands in the top ribbing, but it could be done.

3) Some combination of options 1 and 2. This would alleviate the gaping in the back and the general sag.

4) Knit some sleeves. I was thinking of something like Glampyre's One Skein Wonder knit separately and seamed along the top edge of the back of the bandeau. This would give me a shape somewhat like Tubey, but with shorter sleeves.

5) Frog it. I don't want to; those cables look mighty fine, if I do say so myself. But part of me says that this is the best option. Will I ever wear a merino bandeau? A merino halter? A merino tank? A merino short-sleeved sweater? A small voice in the back of my head is saying that the outlook is not good.

Ugh. I hate making decisions. Especially sucky decisions.
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